Trek rebooted, BSG style

Since Battlestar Galactica was such a brilliant deconstruction and reinvention of the modern space opera, and a magnificent work of modern drama in its own right, it's clear a similar reimagining is the way to go for other iconic space series.

The sometimes-mooted 'reboot' of Star Trek- J.M Straczynski and Bryce Zabel approached Paramount with such a concept a few years back, which no doubt would have proved very gratifying for Straczynski, given how often he enjoyed denigrating the Trek franchise and offering his own work as vastly superior- is the obvious first step.

The 21st century audience has very different standards for what constitutes compelling, thought-provoking drama. They expect more; more action, more conflict, more realism. Here then is a truly 'futuristic' Star Trek!

The 23rd Century...

The United Federation of Planets - An interstellar evolution of Earth's United Nations, the UFP is a fragile alliance of over a hundred worlds brought together in the interests of mutual defence and exploration. Founded on the idealism and naiive dreams common to all intelligent races, the Federation is choked by bureacracy and constantly threated by in-fighting and tensions between the very different species who find themselves living side by side.

Starfleet - The military and explorative arm of the Federation, comprising countless light cruisers, frigates, battleships and the 'starship'-type vessels assigned to all high-profile missions. Starfleet is popular with the public but also controversial, often accused of heavy-handedness and of being far too inclined to respond with force to any alien lifeforms that don't fall into line with the Federation ethos.

USS Enterprise - The most advanced and powerful of the Constitution-class heavy cruisers, with a compliment of over 2,000 officers and crew.

The Crew:

Captain James Kirk - The Enterprise's brash, hard-living captain from a long line of career Starfleet officers. Kirk endured a painfully strict and desolate upbringing by his embittered father, who would never hesitate to use physical abuse to motivate the son he saw as feckless and undisciplined.
Having grown from a teenage hellraiser into a decorated, non-nonsense combat veteran and quickly risen through the ranks, Kirk is a fearless fighter and as callous towards the (very frequent) loss of junior crewman as to his countless female conquests.
Kirk abandoned his academy sweetheart, Carol, after convincing her to abort their unplanned child (or so he thought...). Now as famous for his womanizing and drinking as his military strategies, Kirk inspired the unofficial motto of the Starship program, oft-quoted by the Enterprise crew: "We come in peace- shoot to kill!" (Ideal casting: Eric Dane)

Cmdr. Jordan Spock - Aloof, ethereal science officer and Kirk's trusted second-in-command. Spock is the first child born of a Vulcan/ human pairing, barely surviving the first weeks of his life and now bound by a lifetime regimen of radical drug therapy to stabilise the two races' warring physiologies. Gifted with the telepathic abillities native to Vulcans, Spock's mixed heritage and sexual orientation make him a pariah on both of his home worlds. (Ideal casting: Cillian Murphy)

Dr. Joanna "Bones" McCoy M.D - Wry, cynical ship's surgeon hailing from the deep south. McCoy completes the triumvirate at the helm of Starfleet's flagship. Much given to cursing and provoking heated arguments with Spock, the twice divorced, chain smoking "Bones" is a woman haunted by past failiures and the spectre of the many patients she couldn't save during her wartime service on the front lines. (Ideal casting: Laura Linney)

Chief Engineer Roberta "Scotty" Burns - Excitable Scottish crackpot, Lt. Cmdr. Burns loves nothing more than to make dire pronouncements to her superior officers about the state of the ship's engines, only to perform a last minute 'miracle', such as effectively changing the laws of physics in order to save ship and crew. Unsettlingly inclined to drink on duty, a foible only just tolerated by Kirk, Scotty is also know for frequently waking up next to various Enterprise crewmembers, male or female, human or otherwise, with no recollection of the previous evening beyond gaudily-coloured alien liquor.

Comm. Officer Samara Ben-Uhura - Exotic, mixed-race lingust and head of ship's communications. Raised in Africa and a gifted singer, Uhura shares a deep bond with Spock, whom she sees as a kindred spirit, and a long-simmering flirtation with Captain Kirk. The very obvious physical tension between the two is an open secret aboard the Enterprise, and a constant threat to the careers of both officers.

Security Chief Roger Kyle - Blonde, palpably posh British tactical officer. Supercilious and deadpan, Kyle provides muscle to landing parties, along with a seemingly never-ending roster of faceless 'redshirt' officers, known for their very short life expectancies.

Navigator Dmitri Chekhov - The young, blue-eyed Russian Ensign struggles to impress the other brigde officers, all except for Spock with whom he enjoys a secret, torrid love affair during off-duty hours.

Flight Controller Darcus Leon Sulu - Enterprise's helmsman and best shuttlefighter pilot, the towering Nubian Lieutenant speaks with a surprisingly melodious voice and has a passion for gun fighting and antique marine craft.


Klingons - Barbarous and primitive enemy race who pose an ever-present threat to the security of the UFP and her allies. Thought still essentially a tribal people, the Klingon Empire has aquired advanced technologies, including warp drive and sophisticated weapons, via trade and conquest.
Klingons are a brutish warrior people whose culture is founded on hostility, religious intolerance, the subjugation of women and a fanatical belief in their divine obligation to exterminate all those who refuse to live by the dictates of 'The Law of Kahless'.
Disaffected Federation citizens are sometimes known to be radicalised by Klingon dogma and suicide attacks on Federation outposts are increasingly common.

Romulans - Longime idealogical opponents of the UFP, the ruthlessly efficient and secretive Romulans were once uneasy allies with the Federation against the Klingons, during the first Earth/ Kronos War. Now they wage a cold war against both powers, quietly working to develop terrifying new advances in the technology of warfare, among them the notorious cloaking device, said to allow any ship to become totally invisible to scanners and the the naked eye alike. Romulan agents are sometimes said to have infiltrated every level of the Federation's infrastructure.

The Five Year Mission - Primarily, the Enterprise voyages beyond the frontiers of known space on a humanitarian mission of peaceful exploration... But their other mission objective, known only to the senior officers, involves the the search for fragments of code implanted into the genetic structure of lifeforms all across the galaxy. Once unlocked, this code may yield secrets of the nature of life itself, or power beyond all imagination.

With each new adventure, the crew discovers new truths, finds their values and perceptions challenged, and fights for their lives against unholy terrors... Going boldy where no person has gone before!


Afterword: Any sense of flippancy or satire is entirely in the imagination of the reader. It was certainly not my intention to suggest that the BSG school of 'reimagining', by giving familiar names to essentially new characters, actually diminishes the icons from which it draws inspiration (google 'Brand Recognition' for more). Or indeed that modern writers and audience alike favour sensationalism, contrived story arcs and cheap shock value over optimism and aspirational nobility, under the smug delusion that this is somehow more 'mature' and 'sophisticated'. Lord, no. Heaven forfend.

Incidentally, you can read the Straczynski/ Zabel treatment for "rebooting the universe" at http://bztv.typepad.com/newsviews/2006/06/spaced_out_star.html if you really must.

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